There are a lot of things that bring joy to my life, but I have found over the years that my relationship with Jesse ranks up there on what makes me truly happy. In order for relationships to be healthy, happy, and successful, they must be nurtured. Jesse and I have only been married a short 14 years and don’t know everything about living happily ever after. In fact, we have had our moments of disgust, pouting, and downright anger. But we get through. I, as a happy mama, have to have a healthy and happy relationship with my significant other or else the happy gets taken out of happy mama. (and I am not a good mama any other way) Here are some things that help me keep my happy status in regards to my relationship with Jesse:
kind of cheesy, I know, but I love this
– Date once a week: Several years ago, we committed to a date night once a week. Sometimes we don’t make it very far from the house, but we realize the importance of having “us” time. The weeks when we have slacked, we have noticed a change in our relationship and the ability to tolerate all that goes on at our home. When our kids were small and we couldn’t afford a babysitter each week, we started a babysitting group with 3 other couples. We each took a Friday night to watch all the kids, then the other 3 Friday nights were ours for date night. This was heaven (and brilliant, I must say) and lasted for about 6 or 7 years. Don’t let excuses come in and spoil your time with your spouse. Make it happen.
– Weekend getaways: Time is short. Money is tight. We can all make excuses. We try to get in small getaways for just the two of us every now and then. It rekindles the fire and always reminds me of what a gem I have for a husband and that we actually DO like each other! Even better…we sometimes take an extended trip (like a week) with NO KIDS! I’m telling you that every couple needs getaways. And I am always right.
– Small unexpected tokens of love: It’s nice to have something done for you without you asking and vice versa. Unexpected services of love always remind me that Jesse is thinking of me. I try to do things that are out of the ordinary (laundry and cooking don’t count) to show my love for him. Washing his car, buying his favorite shirt, writing a love note, a wink across the room, etc.
– Words go a long ways: I never let a day go by without telling Jesse that I love him, and I am pretty sure I would cry if Jesse didn’t tell me he loved me every single day. But it also goes beyond that. My heart skips a beat when he tells me I look beautiful or pays me a compliment. I treasure those moments. (now go tell your spouse you love them).
– Wedding rings: I’ll admit that I get lazy sometimes and go for long periods of time without wearing my wedding ring. Jesse does, too. But when we are both wearing them, it is a wonderful reminder of the commitments we have made to each other and that day 14 years ago that we said “I Do” to the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Again, we aren’t experts on a happy marriage, but I do know that these small and simple things keep us connected as a couple and keep this mama happy.